An interview with Katherine Kim by Sungsoo (Steven) Kim on Mixed Korean: Our Stories, An Anthology

An interview with Katherine Kim by Sungsoo (Steven) Kim on Mixed Korean: Our Stories, An Anthology

 

1.       This book was dedicated to Sue-Je Gege, who was she?  Could tell us why and how come did you dedicated this book to her?

 

Sue-Je Gage was a professor of anthropology at Ithaca College in Ithaca, New York. She herself was mixed-race, with a Korean mother,  fathered by an American GI. She had studied Amerasians in Korea and was a voice for us both in South Korea as well as in the US. She was a single mother, and one of the most humble and loving people you might have ever met. She was adored by everyone she met: students, colleagues, fellow faculty and friends. Sue-Je not only wrote the foreword for the Mixed Koreans: Our Stories anthology, but she was also the anonymous author of the poem within the book, Girl Child.

 

I wanted to dedicate the Korean translation of this anthology to Sue-Je to honor her work with the Amerasian population and to honor her as the beautiful person she was. Sadly she passed this year, quickly and expectedly. She had underlying Lyme disease but there may have been Covid complications.

 

We were supposed to travel to Korea in October 2020 to help launch this book and she was going to participate in that effort. Sadly, the tour had to be cancelled because of the pandemic, and sadly too, should there ever be any future book readings in South Korea, she will not be with us in person but always with us in memory.

 

2.       What were the main feedbacks and book reviews from American readers when you published this book last year in the USA?

 

One of the questions I had been asked by a reviewer was did we intentionally set out to write a dark and sad book, and the truth is, no. I don't think we were soliciting sad stories. We merely solicited stories, stories that shared experiences of the book contributors. Not all stories are sad, but I think there is an overarching theme of struggle within many of them. But that we are all here and are able to share these stories is a testament to the resilience of our mixed-race community.

 

3.       Why and how come you decided to publish this book? How did you start this project?

 

Although I was sent for adoption in 1961 at age 3.5, I grew up in a vacuum, unaware that there had been thousands upon thousands of adoptees sent from Korea. In 2012, I learned about IKAA (International Korean Adoptees Association),  and then got involved with many of the online KAD (Korean Adoptee) groups. I quickly learned about my history as a mixed race adoptee through my own online research, reading both scholarly papers as well as books on the topic of mixed race in Korea. I became curious about the trajectories of being mixed Korean and was interested in basically three groups: those who grew up in Korea as mixed-race; those who were sent for adoption and raised by white or black families; and those who were raised by their Korean mothers and GI fathers (note: two of the stories are actually authored by two professional writers, both of whom have Korean fathers). I was hoping to learn more about how our lives were different and how they might have been the same. I had the greatest difficulty soliciting stories from those who spent most of their time growing up in Korea. I approached many who were here living in the US (who had come over as older teens or as adults) and the majority declined. I think it is because their lives in Korea were so filled with difficulty that they didn't want to revisit that part of their pasts. So that is the one area in which I think the anthology fell short. I would have wished for more stories from those who actually spent more time growing up in Korea.

 

4.       What should be done by the USA and Korean citizens and the governments to eliminate racism, discrimination and prejudices against mixed blood children and people? 

 

This is a very tough question but a timely one. As you know we are in the midst of a contentious transition in leadership here in the US, and our new president-elect has promised to fill cabinet positions with POC (People of Color) that reflect what America looks like today. I think real sea changes do need to start using a top-down approach, one in which leadership recognizes that we are not all one color, or one ethnicity. I am thrilled to see that vice-president elect Kamala Harris is mixed race (Jamaican Black and South Asian), and I know newly elected Marilyn Strickland, the former mayor of Tacoma, Washington, won her race for the US House of Representatives, becoming the first Korean American woman elected to the US Congress in its 230-year history and she is Korean/Black. So I think in time we will see more POC and mixed-race peoples in positions in government and that these changes in govt personnel  will help to wield systemic changes in policy and hopefully will trickle down to create positive social changes and greater acceptance within American society.

 

I would like to see the same happen in South Korea but I think that will take much longer. As we know South Korea is socially/culturally behind other countries in terms of social changes. Single motherhood is a perfect example of that. Single mothers are a common thing here in the US and in many western nations, but it is still so very taboo in South Korea. As far as mixed race and the acceptance of mixed race in Korea I think it will take a lot more time. South Koreans are glad to claim those of us who have reached celebrity status or have attained high socio-economic achievements  (i.e., Insooni, Marjorie Vongerichten, Judge Judy Draper, Dr. Estelle Cooke-Sampson, or Thomas Park Clement) but to recognize mixed-race Koreans in general, I think South Korea is a LONG WAYS AWAY from any real change or acceptance. I hope that this book will be read by at least the younger generation and that it will help pave the way for greater social change in South Korea.

 

 

5.       In this anthology, to you, what was the saddest story and happiest story respectively, and why? 

 

I was moved by so very many stories, but one of the saddest for me was Meeky Woo Flippen's. It was a fairly sanitized version of her experiences,  but it told the story of her sexual abuse by well-known Catholic priest, Father Keane, who was a known pedophile among the adoptees in his orphanage and the staff who worked there, but who was supposed to be a respected voice for Amerasian rights, both in South Korea and in the US. He was a person in a respected position, but in truth was a predator of the most vulnerable in South Korean society.

 

One of happiest stories for me was Joel Peterson's, and the love that he received from his adopted family. Although oatmeal was not a preferred food of his, it was a metaphor for the love that he received and was desperately in need of. His story was one of love and care.

 

6.       You requested publication of Korean version of this book to KoRoot. Why especially Korean readers should read this book?

 

The answer to this question is related to question number 4 above. I think for social change to occur that more people need to be aware of the problems that mixed Koreans faced, past and present. I hope that people who read this book will "feel"  the challenges that many of us experienced and had to overcome. People's hearts need to be touched, and I hope that in reading these stories, that they will learn that social change must happen to help make our world a better place . People might look different on the outside but on the inside we all long for visibility, belonging and love. And these are universal to everyone, no matter where anyone grows up.

 

7.       What was the most difficult and hard experience growing up and living as a mixed Korean/adoptee in Korea and the USA?

 

For me personally, the hardest was feeling alone. I actually looked quite Asian as a kid and it was very apparent that I was adopted so everyone always felt entitled to my story. Any adoptee's story starts as one of hurt and loss, but these aspects of our lives are glossed over and so we learn to bury these feelings, as though they don't exist or matter. I never felt a sense of belonging and fell into the category of in between. Here in the US we talk about being  neither fish nor fowl and this part was hard for me. I wasn't even part of a larger adoptee community which might have helped be find my tribe as a kid. Because I was part of the first wave of adoptees, there were not so many Asians in the US so I never had a peer group to mirror who I was. I always grew up in white communities so didn't even know that I looked Asian to others till I was in my early 20s.

 

8.       In your opinion, what is the problem with the overseas adoption practice of Korea?

 

I think adoption, while a necessary evil, should follow this line of practice: support of single motherhood first; if this is not possible then placing a child within extended family; if that isn't possible, then domestic adoption within Korea, and the very last option should be overseas adoption. While some were adopted by loving families, many were not but I think most Korean adoptees (good placements or bad) have struggled with identity....again the problems of belonging and having people who mirror what you yourself look like. And not growing up in families or communities that deny your ethnicity and who may practice overt racism or nuanced forms of it.

 

9.       How do you evaluate the positive and negative roles of Christians in the overseas adoption?

 

This is a loaded question. As you know many of the early adoptions were done by Holt and the only prerequisite for them was that the family be Christian. Well, religious belief or practice does not a good family make and that we know based on how many children grew up in toxic families. That said, for those of us who were adopted in the earlier years, 50s and 60s, I think most of us were thankful that we were given a chance at life and education, regardless of how good or bad our families might have been. I know this is especially true for those of us who were mixed race adoptees.

 

10.   Do you have any advice to the governments and people of the USA and Korea regarding overseas adoption policies?

 

This is again a loaded question. Many adoptees are opposed to the special adoption laws in Korea, thinking it unfair for children to grow up in orphanages rather than in families because of a lack of a paper trail. For me though I favor the change in the law and feel that every child deserves to have an honest paper trail and to know his or her heritage. I believe that should be a human right. 

 

11.   In 2019, you met your Korean biological mother. How come?  How is she?  How did you feel after you met your Korean mother? Do you know how you became an overseas adoptee?

 

I helped create an NPO (www.325kamra.org) that uses DNA to find biological family back in 2015. Thru this work I was able to locate my Korean mother, who I first started looking for in the mid 1980s. I think DNA and the internet has been a game changer in birth family search. I learned by Korean mother  married a GI and immigrated to the US a year after I was sent for adoption. Her story is a common narrative for those of us who are mixed. 

 

She initially rejected me, stating that I was not hers. I was a secret she had buried for nearly 60 years. It was a bumpy reunion but I talk with her a few times a week now. I think she has her own traumas - having grown up during WWII during Occupation, then the Korean War and the poverty post war. I think her ability to have relationships with me and her other children have been impacted by all of her early life traumas but we are slowly building a relationship and I am so very grateful to have learned about my heritage and to know where I come from. I know that I represent a fairly small percentage of adoptees who have found their biological family and I feel extremely privileged in that way. I wish all adoptees could find their biological families and again, feel that that knowledge should be a fundamental right.

 

12.   Now, what is the most important in your life and why?

 

I recently finished another anthology, Together At Last, Stories of adoption and reunion in the age of DNA, so am now just taking a break from adoptee work and issues. My focus these days is on trying to survive the pandemic, and build better relations with my own children (one of whom is adopted as well but not from Korea), and continue working on my relationships with my Korean biological family.